S_0001 LOG in CASUAL clothes with luggage standing in front of a building

        NARRATOR: Fuck! I don't want to do this! But, here I am, anyway, standing in front of my best friend's place, ready to move in 'cause, currently, I don't have a place to live. I was evicted from my apartment … for not paying my rent, which wasn't.... Fuck it, that's an unpleasant story I'm just too disgusted to talk about, right now.

        NARRATOR: I know you're thinking I'm a fortunate guy to have a friend like Nathan ready to provide me shelter, meals, and WiFi for 30 whole days; but, well.... I'm more lucky than you know. Kind of. You see, Nathan may be my best bud; but, he married THE girl of all girls for me; my high school crush - Yasmine.

        NARRATOR: Oh, yes, Yasmine, the one girl, who could lift my mood with just the mischievous quirk of her shapely lips; my partner-in-crime, who would laugh until she'd nearly faint whenever I got away with something; the girl, who bested all of my stupidest jokes with even sillier ones of her own.

        NARRATOR: Yasmine was my confidante, the only one who ever lent an attentive ear to any and all of my problems and secrets; except one. 'Cause, I kinda, well, never told Yasmine my most important secret; that I'd fallen, completely and undyingly, for her. I never told her that every time she had spoken to me of another latest crush on some lucky, stupid guy ... I would grimace a brittle smile, while feeling my soul shatter to shards, taking my broken heart with it.

        NARRATOR: I do know why she never thought of me like that, except because my fat ass then could never, would never number among any of her crushes, or desires. Why would I want to see lovely and perfect Yasmine, again, knowing she would NEVER see me as more than a friend? An asexual … friend.

        NARRATOR: That is Yasmine for me: Heaven and Hell in one gorgeous package. Honestly, parting ways with her after high school graduation was the most bittersweet and painfully difficult experience of my younger life. Meeting her again may top that long ago childish history. Married to my best friend, while I've avoided her, until now.... I'm not quite sure what this will be like.

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S_0005 YAS is pointing to the bathroom door(s) while standing and LOG stands next to her (luggage somewhere as well)

        YAS: The bathroom is right there. Our bedroom's on the other side; so, we'll be sharing.

        LOG: Oh, okay. I still can't believe I'm here, with you and Nathan, and that we're going to spend so much time together, now.

        YAS: You sound dubious about it. Get over it, dude, I have soooo many stories about our high school friends that you need to hear. They're always asking about you, too, assuming I know about you; have I seen you, talked to you, what do you look like now. That one is always from the girls.

        LOG: Huh, the “girls” just want to know if I'm still fat, because if they're having man trouble, they assume I'm still available for them to fall back on, and be their big cushion. Hm, I am a little curious about some people, I've been in the dark. I go online for business, so I haven't made a large footprint online for private stuff. I've lost contact with most everyone except Nathan and you, since graduation.

        YAS: Not so much contact with me, but we're going to change that while you're here, my old friend, because I am going to tell you everything, like I … like we used to back in the day.

        A1: Tell her, “Yazzy, keep it cool and don't bore Nathan with those stories too much.”

        A2: Be honest, “I regret that our relationship didn't end up ... differently, back then.”

S_0006 Close up on smiling YAS

IF A1

        YAS: Oh, God, I haven't heard you call me “Yazzy” in years! I've really missed that. And you. But, you're probably right. Nathan wasn't in our little private group back then, and missed a lot of … foolishness and fun. Telling him all just might be too much for him.

        LOG: I've missed … a lot. And I realize right now that I haven't been feeling well for a long while; but just five minutes with you two and I am feeling amazing. And kinda hopeful. That's a surprise.

        YAS: You should always feel that way and I love that we, your friends, are able to help you during your crisis. Your crisis is my crisis; mi casa su casa.

        LOG: Thank you, Yasmine, for everything, this means a lot to me.

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S_0011 LOG sits on sofa, YAS on sofa next to him and NAT on a small coffee table in front of sofa - all are having drinks in their hands. NAT is touching his wife's knee while she sits near LOG than before.

        NAT: “Friendly” and “beautiful” have their merits but it doesn't necessarily make her hot. Is Vanessa hot?

        LOG: Yeah, in a she - looks - easy - and - looking - for - some - side - dick - since - Rick - is - already - paying - her - bills – way.

        NAT: Wow, take a breath man. But, on the good side, she's easy. Did you bang her?

        YAS: Stop that, Nathan. That's too rude, even for you.

        LOG: It's okay, Yazzy, it's funny, actually. I didn't bang her. Never touched Vanessa, though she kept trying to touch me. Remember how good I was at dodge ball in Phys Ed, despite looking like a ball myself?

        NAT: Yes, weirdly, nearly eerily untouchable. I wrenched my arm trying to bean you.

        LOG: Well, too bad, Nathan, and I've still got it. But out of the blue, Rick accuses me of having an “intimate relationship” with his wife. And while my brain was too stunned to think realize Vanessa must've lied to him, he fired me, on the spot, even though he's known me for years and I'm as reliable as all hell.

        NAT: What a stupid dick. And that bitch.

        YAS: Logan, that's not like you, why didn't you fight for your job?

        LOG: I was too stunned from the illogic of it all. I mean, it was so out of left field, after I'd been so good about not even acknowledging her blatant come on fuck me signals. It just didn't occur to me to stay; I was so out of it that I left the company still speechless. That night I get an email from Rick saying he wouldn't be paying my scheduled salary for this month.

        LOG: Of course, Rick screws me, after I didn't screw his cheap wife, just when I don't have any money saved for a moment like this. I'd just spent it all replacing my crashed laptop. I need that to work online, whether I work for Rick or not. And three days after he fired me, I was evicted out of my apartment, too. My salary was going to cover my rent, that was my plan, until Vanessa and Rick's bullshit cut me off at the knees.

        YAS: I'm sure what he did was illegal, he has to pay you your earned salary, Logan; except, maybe, if there was stolen cash value. Vanessa wasn't charging you for her supposed imaginary charms, was she?

        NARRATOR: I liked that, we all laughed. Yazzy always hated lazy girls who try to fuck their way to glory and riches.

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